Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
Steven Wright (1955 -)
Contributed by: Zaady
Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers?
Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright... until you hear them speak?
Smoking cures weight problems . . . eventually.
So what's the speed of dark?
Someone sent me a postcard picture of the earth. On the back it said, "Wish you were here."
Sorry . . . my mind was wandering . . . One time it went all the way to Venus and ordered a meal I couldn't pay for.
Sponges grow in the ocean. That just kills me. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be if that didn't happen.
Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.
Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.
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