Life after Fifty Everything hurts and what doesn't hurt doesn't work. The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals. You feel like the night before and you haven't been anywhere. You get winded playing chess. Your children begin to look middle aged. You begin to outlive enthusiasm. Your mind makes contracts your body can't meet. You know all the answers, but nobody asks you the questions. You look forward to a dull evening. Your favorite part of the newspaper is 25 Years Ago Today. You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going. Your knees buckle and your belt won't. You reget all those mistakes resisting temptation. Dialing long distance wears you out. Your back goes out more than you do. A fortune teller offers to read your face. You burn the midnight oil after 9:00 pm. You sink your teeth into a steak and they stay there. You get your exercise acting as a pallbearer for your friends who exercise. You have too much room in the house & not enough room in the medicine cabinet. The best part of my day is over when the alarm goes off.