George Carlin

A Quote by George Carlin on davaadolgor, delger, mongolian student in edinburgh, idiot, maniac, and george carlin

"Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac."

George Carlin

Source: www.dontquoteme.com

Contributed by: Davaadolgor

A Quote by George Carlin

Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. 

George Carlin

Contributed by: Joycelyn Annette

A Quote by George Carlin on america, pollution, mountains plains, seas, and skies

Oh beautiful for smoggy skies, insecticided grain, For strip-mined mountains majesty above the asphalt plain! America, America, man sheds his waste on thee, And hides the pines with billboard signs, from sea to oily sea!

George Carlin

Contributed by: Sagittaria

A Quote by George Carlin

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers; wider freeways but narrower viewpoints. We spend more but have less; we buy more but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families; more conveniences but less time. We have more degrees but less sense; more knowledge but less judgment; more experts yet more problems; more medicine but less wellness.We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.We've learned how to make a living but not a life. We've added years to life, not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We've conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things but not better things.We've cleaned up the air but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom but not our prejudice. We write more but learn less. We plan more but accomplish less. We've learned to rush but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information to produce more copies than ever but we communicate less and less.These are the times of fast food and slow digestion, big men and small characters, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce; fancier houses but broken homes. These are the days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweights bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer to quiet to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. It is a time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose to either share this insight or to just hit delete. Remember - spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever. Remember - say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person will soon grow up and leave your side. Remember - give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent. Remember to say "I love you" to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you. Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment, for someday that person will not be there again. Give time to love! Give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind. And always remember: life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. If you don't send this to at least 8 people...who cares?

George Carlin

Source: E-newsletter

Contributed by: A

A Quote by George Carlin on death, impermanence, and humor

The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What’s that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you’re too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating …and you finish off as an orgasm.

George Carlin

Contributed by: ~C4Chaos

A Quote by George Carlin on life, tomorrow, and day

The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life.

George Carlin

Contributed by: Nancy

A Quote by George Carlin on living

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Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

George Carlin

Contributed by: Amelia

A Quote by George Carlin

The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.

George Carlin

Contributed by: meaghan

A Quote by George Carlin

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

George Carlin

Contributed by: blue dragon

A Quote by George Carlin

If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.

George Carlin

Contributed by: blue dragon

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