Ah, love. Each Valentine’s Day, lovers take pause to recognize that special someone in their lives. Pink and red hearts ornament retail locations, and flowers, chocolates, jewelry and other gifts are purchased and exchanged. Hands are held, sweet nothings are shared and love is in the air.
But what if these tokens of romantic affection mean something more sinister than the celebration of love and friendship? What if the production of these goods comes at a grave cost for the people directly connected to them?
April 2013 marks the beginning of the tenth year of Spiritual Cinema Circle! This month, we celebrate the way that great stories can connect us to the world.
The Last Brickmaker in America, our feature for April, stars the legendary actor Sidney Poitier as a man who has been making bricks by hand for more than 50 years and who proves to be a profound example of how to build life “brick by brick.”
Can you believe it? We’re already halfway into February! I have been getting calls for counseling requests around relationships; Valentine woes and deep feelings of aloneness. I even got a Facebook message from a man challenged with his life choices and loss of love. I am very clear that every person on this planet wants to love and be loved. We all want to feel special, be seen and acknowledged for the beautiful beings that we are. So why is it so hard to “find” love?
I’m a 43-year-old Romeo. Seriously. At the ripe, sweet age of 43, I’m playing the star-crossed lover in the Shakespeare classic. It was a surprise to me when the director casting this production asked me to play young Romeo. When I stop to think about it, it cracks me up. I mean, this character typically is seen as a horny, brash teenager on the brink of becoming a man and discovering true love.
Ah, true love! It’s a common enough phrase and yet I do believe it’s not actually all that common in our world.
I have been married for 10 years. Three years ago I began a serious spiritual path to discovering the awesome abundance of possibilities in the spiritual world. I have asked my husband to join me on this journey. I have told him that I love him and I long for more romance and spontaneity. His response was very negative and he says I am forcing him into something he is not comfortable with. He surfs, windsurfs and plays guitar and he says that this is way of connecting to the Spirit. Do you think a marriage can survive if one partner embraces the spiritual journey and the other does not?
Planning and scheduling time with those you love is obviously crucial to maintaining a healthy and happy relationship. We are all so busy these days that it’s always a good idea to schedule time to reconnect.
If you’re like most people, your dates/special times are based on “calories consumed,” whether that means eating at a new restaurant, getting snacks at a movie, meeting for a fancy coffee or a glass of wine after work. These things can be great ideas for spending time together but once in a while why not try looking at the opportunity to be with those you love a little differently?
Plan your time with loved ones based on “calories burned.” What I mean is to pick activities to do together that are focused on being active and expending calories.
At the age of 28, I decided that dating had thoroughly kicked my butt. It seemed as if 99 percent of my friends were engaged or married or having babies; meanwhile, I continued pursuing a breed of man who was never quite able to leave behind his college glory days and blatantly refused to face adulthood. It’s an irresistible combination, I know.
In my early twenties, I had the supernatural ability to hone in on this type of man in the midst of a crowd and can only blame myself for my early dating mishaps. But at some point in my mid-20s, I made a dramatic internal proclamation that I would never seek out this type of man again. But from then on they just came to me. I became the pied piper who attracts the emotionally stunted and unavailable.
The only thing worse than my actual dating history was when I made my friends listen to my tales of woe. This is why, when my friends could take no more, I was finally convinced to give the online dating scene a shot. I had recently undergone an especially rough breakup, to which my sanity, sobriety and eating habits were not responding well, so I figured I had nothing to lose.
I am 46 years old and unmarried. Last summer, I connected with someone online and we both felt we were soulmates, brought together by divine intervention. Two months later he decided to fly 5,000 miles to come meet me, with an understanding that the meeting was just to see each other at least once and get comfortable.
Upon our meeting, the guy felt there was no chemistry. Because we had so much in common, I was willing to give it a try, but he wasn’t, although he did want to keep in touch and remain friends, which I said no to.
Arielle and Brian, why does this happen? Is it right to give up so much in common for chemistry? Was this guy not really my soulmate? I am confused.
My wife Lauren and I were delighted to see Woody Allen’s new film,Midnight in Paris, over the weekend. The film is wonderfully entertaining, very sweet and really a lot of fun.
Owen Wilson plays a successful screenwriter who has come to Paris with his fiancée and her parents. While his fiancée sees the trip as a shopping opportunity, Mr. Wilson has a different agenda. He has always loved the notion of being a novelist, has indeed written his first book, and is enamored with the whole concept of being an artist in Paris, not a commercial “hack.” Unfortunately, his fiancée (played with great audacity and courage by Rachel McAdams) is shallow, materialistic and totally horrified that her soon-to-be husband is actually considering a career that is not based solely on making money.
During the past year I have done many of your suggested soulmate manifestation exercises, however, I still haven’t been able to emotionally pull the cord from my past relationship with Doug. We dated for a few months and then transitioned to just “good friends” because I’m not physically attracted to him and no longer wanted to be physically intimate with him. I care deeply for him and truly enjoy our time together as friends. I feel my heart is very connected to his but I can’t seem to resolve this past relationship and move on in peace. If you have any advice I would appreciate it!