parents

Idle Worship

Leslie Garrett by Leslie Garrett | March 4th, 2013 | No Comments
topic: Green Living | tags: AIDS orphans, anxious, apple, at-risk girls, baby building, barriers to productive, bike, bike trailers, books, burn-out, busy, busy people, busyness, climate change, concerts, creation, dinners with friends, down and up, education, eureka, exciting lives, father, get-ahead friends, goof around, google, growth, home, idleness, incubation, inspiration, kids, lazy days, marathon, not enough, not enough time, parents, parties, pet owner, play, popular, puritans, strength, the busy trap, tim kreider, time in demand, tired, toddlers, travel, wife, work commitments, work ethic, writers, yin and yang, youth

“Busy” has become the anthem of the anxious. And yet, when asked, most are hard-pressed to say what, exactly, they’re so busy doing. They shrug and say, “you know, with kids,” or an even more vague, “Not enough hours in the day.”

There was a time I envied those “busy” people. Thanks to a youth spent largely ignored by my more-popular peers, I equated “busy” with “popular.” At home with my books, I imagined “busy” meant parties and concerts, dinners with friends, and interesting work commitments. The lives of “busy” people struck me as exciting. Their time was in demand, and their busyness seemed an indictment of my own busy-less life.

7 Tips for Talking to Children About the School Shooting

Susan Stiffelman by Susan Stiffelman | December 17th, 2012 | No Comments
topic: Family Health, Health & Wellness, Personal Growth, Relationships | tags: afraid to go to school, aggression, anxiety, appetite, campus, children, comfort, Connecticut, conversation, emotions, fear, feelings, guns, kids, mood swings, news coverage, parenting advice, parents, Sandy Hook, school shooting, security, sleep, stress, students, support, talking to kids, tips, tragedy, traumatized, violence

School Shooting

What can you say when there are no words?

We are all still reeling in the aftermath of the school shootings in Connecticut last Friday. I, for one, feel leveled and heartbroken. It is impossible to imagine the impact on the families who lost children, those whose children were spared but so profoundly traumatized, and the rest of us who bear witness from afar to the unthinkable.

Here, in the interest of offering at least a few words of comfort, is some guidance on how to talk to your children in the wake of this tragedy.

What to Do When Your Child Lies

Susan Stiffelman by Susan Stiffelman | November 15th, 2012 | No Comments
topic: Family Health, Health & Wellness, Personal Growth, Relationships | tags: child's behavior, children, confess, control issues, converstaion, dad, daughter, father, feelings, good liars, honest, honesty, kids, lies, lying, misbehaving, misbehavior, mom, mother, parenting advice, parenting problems, parents, problem, rules, son, talk, tell the truth

A reader recently wrote me to ask for advice about a common parenting problem:

My 6-year-old lies to me on a daily basis. He hides food in his room and lies about it, among other things. How can I get him to tell the truth?

I consider a child’s misbehavior to be a flashing neon sign announcing that something else is going on that needs to be addressed. In other words, the lying and deceptive behavior is a symptom of something else.

Young Athletes: Are Kids Specializing in Sports Too Early?

Gwen Lawrence by Gwen Lawrence | October 17th, 2012 | No Comments
topic: Family Health, Fitness, Health & Wellness, Yoga | tags: baseball, basketball, body balance, children, coaches, football, Gwen Lawrence, kids, left dominant sports, michael jordan, muscle development, muscles, parenting, parents, physical development, right dominant sports, soccer, sports, sports specialization, sports training, tennis

Kids in Sports

Could your children be making decisions that hurt their physical development? While I don’t claim to be a doctor, I do have very specific feelings about your young athletes specializing in one sport too early. Consider these points when your 12-year-old tells you he/she only wants to play soccer from here on out and eventually become a pro!

How to Approach Frustrated Children

Susan Stiffelman by Susan Stiffelman | September 21st, 2012 | No Comments
topic: Family Health, Health & Wellness, Personal Growth, Relationships | tags: adapt, adaptation, change, children, cry, crying, dad, frustrated, frustration, happy, kids, mom, parenting, parents, tantrums, tears

Crying child

Childhood is full of frustrating moments. Nature has designed life in such a way as to guarantee that children will have their wishes denied many times a day. Kids are small, physically disadvantaged, in need of support that isn’t always available, and desirous of all sorts of things that their caretakers determine aren’t good for them.

As loving parents, we hate it when our children cry, and we’ll jump through hoops to keep their tears at bay. We buy them the toys they can’t live without, force their big sisters to play Barbies with them, or let them stay up late even though we know they’ll be tired the next day.

But when we intervene every time our children become frustrated — believing we’re doing so out of love and care — we prevent them from learning the lesson of adaptation.

Family-Friendly Spa Vacations to Rejuvenate All Ages

Wendy Worrall Redal by Wendy Worrall Redal | July 30th, 2012 | 5 Comments
topic: Eco Travel, Family Health, Green Living, Health & Wellness | tags: acne, Arizona Grand Resort & Spa, Austin, baby massage, beauty, body wrap, California, children, Chocolate Spa, dad, Disney Aulani Resort, facial, family vacation, Fitness, Grand Wailea, hawaii, Hawaiian lomi lomi treatment, Hotel Hershey, Hyatt Regency Hill Country Resort & Spa, Hyatt Regency Lost Pine Resort, hydrotherapy, kids, Laniwai Spa, manicure, massage, Maui, mom, nail polish, North Carolina, Oahu, Painted Sky, parents, pedicure, Pennsylvania, Phoenix, Pinehurst Resort, relaxation, San Antonio, san diego, scrub, Sea Spa at Loews Coronado Bay Resort, skincare, Spa at Pinehurst, Spa Grande, spa package, spa vacation, spray-tanning, stress-relief, teenagers, teens, Texas, The SPAhhhT, wellness, Wild Hare Youth Spa, Windflower: The Hill Country Spa, Yoga

Family Spa Vacation

Sometimes I almost regret introducing my 14-year-old daughter to the delights of massage therapy, since she’s now as avid as I am to enjoy the relief and recalibration that come with a good professional treatment, which rarely comes cheap. Yet as a dancer, runner and dedicated student, she benefits as much as I do from the health advantages of bodywork, or even an occasional pedicure treat for her tired feet.

Lately, I’ve found myself thinking that a mother-daughter spa getaway might be refreshing for both us, and a fun way to connect outside our usual daily routine of overly packed schedules.

Traditionally, spa vacations have been romantic retreats for couples or escapes for harried women who juggle too much. Today, however, as kids’ lives get ever busier and stress becomes an issue that even preteens are dealing with, a family spa experience in a restful setting can accomplish two purposes: vacation time together while nurturing wellness for all ages.

How To Green Your School

E.B. Boyd by E.B. Boyd | July 30th, 2012 | 1 Comment
topic: Green Living | tags: children, compost, composting, eco, eco-conscious, education, education and recycling, environmentally friendly, go green, green, green kids, Green Living, green-power, kids, landfills, parents, recycle, recycling bins, reduce, reuse, school, school recycling program, teachers

School recycling program

It’s back to school time for most families, which means it’s a great time to think about how your school is doing on the green front — especially when it comes to the basics, like recycling.

If your school doesn’t already have a recycling program in place, consider starting one. Experts say the general steps to follow are:

Give Up Hope

Marylee Fairbanks by Marylee Fairbanks | May 9th, 2012 | 5 Comments
topic: Personal Growth, Relationships, Yoga | tags: balance, chakra, courage, death, difficulty, expression, facebook, faith, grace, grief, handstand, headstand, HOPE, hopeless, hopelessness, manipura, mother-daughter, parents, Pema Chodron, positive change, spirit, support, third chakra, transformation, trust, Yoga

Give Up Hope

I don’t like being upside down and backwards. This makes Handstand a challenge for me. I don’t trust that my fellow students can hold me steady while I substitute my hands for feet. It’s a reflection of my own limited thinking, not an accurate assessment of their competence.

Still, I try. I go to class and work gradually. First, I achieved Headstand, which I couldn’t do a year ago. It’s a stepping-stone to the loftier goal of Handstand.

Yoga is always putting new challenges in our paths. Just when we think we have achieved a difficult asana, we discover that it was the modified version. It taught me to give up hope.

How to Find Your Parenting Cool When You’ve Temporarily Lost It

Susan Stiffelman by Susan Stiffelman | January 11th, 2012 | 2 Comments
topic: Personal Growth, Relationships | tags: anger, angry, child behavior, children, children's behavior, disappointment, discipline, expectation, family, forgiveness, healthy parenting, homework, kids, parenting, parents

Mother and daughter

It’s often said that we’re living with our best teacher, and nowhere is that more true than with our children. No one has the ability to push our buttons the way our kids do. And no one offers us the opportunity to practice the things we preach — about love, forgiveness and staying centered — like our kids do.

Every parent wants to stay cool, calm and collected. We don’t want to threaten to send them to bed without their supper when they’ve sassed back, or tell them they’re grounded for a month when — yet again — they refuse to honor their curfew. But taking a deep breath or counting to ten can seem almost impossible in the presence of kids who seem to know exactly how to push our biggest buttons.

How to Make the Holidays a Time of Positive Change (Even If You’re Alone!)

Laura Day by Laura Day | November 14th, 2011 | No Comments
topic: Personal Growth, Relationships | tags: arguments, brother, change, christmas, communication, desires, dreams, family, father, fighting, friends, goals, Hanukkah, holidays, husband, intuition, kids, mother, new year's, parents, positive change, relationship patterns, resolutions, sister, thanksgiving, transformation, wife, winter

Happy family eating holiday dinner
You can make the holidays a time of dramatic change and healing by using your innate intuitive abilities in a conscious and directed way.

Holidays are supposed to be a time when families unite, when you are reminded of your childhood or revisit the memories of yourself over the years. You may be spending this time alone or far from home. But no matter where you are or who you are with, the holidays provide you with a unique opportunity to heal the inner patterns and relationships that have been obstructing your life and hindering your dreams.