How about all three?
Did you see the recent New York Times commentary, “Now Scrutinizing: A Rounder Golden Globes“? It’s a bit of an understatement to say that it made me angry. There are so many different issues to bring up with respect to this type of “reporting,” but the one I would like to focus on is the need for us as a culture, as women and as individuals to celebrate beauty in all colors, shapes and sizes, “celebrity” or “real.” The sole purpose of this article, from my point of view, is to point out that these women changed their appearance — maybe, slightly — and that somehow that should change how we perceive them. Um, “More Marilyn than Twiggy …”
Celebrity or not, they are the same women they have always been. They may have shorter or longer hair. They may have gained or lost 10 pounds. Regardless of whether they are with or without make-up, in a red dress or a black dress, they are the same beautiful woman that they were yesterday. And not only should we appreciate their inherent beauty, but we must learn to appreciate the inherent beauty in each of us. We need to stop scrutinizing one another and ourselves because we are all beautiful creatures.
To all of you, and to myself, I say: Love your body!
Unfortunately, that’s very hard for many of us to do, so …
Here are five steps in the process:
1. Look at yourself in the mirror, directly into your own eyes, and say, “I love you exactly as you are”
This can be very hard to do. It makes me cry just to think about doing it, let alone actually doing it. If you’re not ready to do that, put a Post-It on your mirror with the same message, or something similar, like: “You’re beautiful, inside and out.” You can find more ideas and spread it to others with “Operation Beautiful.” Start now.
2. Accept compliments
We all too often deflect kind words as flattery. “Oh, these pants just make my butt look smaller — I’m not really in that great of shape,” or, “It’s easier to look pretty when you actually get some sleep the night before — covers up those awful bags under the eyes I’m usually sporting!” Stop that behavior immediately. Look at the person who complimented you, smile and say, “Thank you.” End of discussion.
3. Give compliments
How does telling some other woman she looks good help you love your body? Well, you can believe in spreading good karma or chi or whatever you want to call it, as I do, and the goodness coming back to you. Or, you can do it to change your state of mind. Look for beauty everywhere, and you will find it in yourself as well.
4. Eliminate negative thoughts about your body
It’s easy to say, but be conscious of self-criticism and quit doing it. When you hear yourself say or think something ugly, remember the promise you made to love yourself as you are. And if that’s not enough to stop the behavior, try turning the criticism around. Instead of “Geez, I have a big butt,” think, “These are some of the sexiest curves on the planet.” Or, “I have powerful glutes.” There is always a benefit. You just have to allow yourself to see it. You are what you think!
5. Reward yourself for the positive things you do for your body
When you exercise, eat well, get rest, stand up tall, play up your assets, compliment others or accept them, verbally applaud yourself, then come up with either an immediate or a long-term reward for your success! Treat yourself to a manicure, pedicure, massage, new clothing or accessories, fitness tools, music, book or vacation.