TALK, v.t. To commit an indiscretion without temptation, from an impulse without purpose.
Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914)
Source: The Devil's Dictionary by Ambrose Bierce
Contributed by: Zaady
SIREN, n. One of several musical prodigies famous for a vain attempt to dissuade Odysseus from a life on the ocean wave. Figuratively, any lady of splendid promise, dissembled purpose and disappointing performance.
SACRED, adj. Dedicated to some religious purpose; having a divine character; inspiring solemn thoughts or emotions; as . . . the Cow in India; the Crocodile, the Cat and the Onion of ancient Egypt.
RECONCILIATION, n. A suspension of hostilities. An armed truce for the purpose of digging up the dead.
POKER, n. A game said to be played with cards for some purpose to this lexicographer unknown.
MAGIC, n. An art of converting superstition into coin. There are other arts serving the same high purpose, but the discreet lexicographer does not name them.
MACE, n. A staff of office signifying authority. Its form, that of a heavy club, indicates its original purpose and use in dissuading from dissent.
FORK, n. An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
FLAG, n. A colored rag borne above troops and hoisted on forts and ships. It appears to serve the same purpose as certain signs that one sees and vacant lots in London - "Rubbish may be shot here."
PROBOSCIS, n. The rudimentary organ of an elephant which serves him in place of the knife-and-fork that Evolution has as yet denied him. For purposes of humor it is popularly called a trunk.
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