Last week, I went to a furniture store to look for a decaffeinated coffee table. They couldn't help me.
Steven Wright (1955 -)
Contributed by: Zaady
Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish.
Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.
My aunt gave me a walkie-talkie for my birthday. She says if I'm good, she'll give me the other one next year.
My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments.
My dog is an East German Shepherd.
It doesn't matter what temperature the room is; it's always room-temperature.
It's a fine night to have an evening.
It's a good thing we have gravity or else when birds died they'd just stay right up there. Hunters would be all confused.
It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it.
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