I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
Steven Wright (1955 -)
Contributed by: Zaady
Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back.
Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
Even snakes are afraid of snakes.
Ever notice how irons have a setting for 'permanent' press? I don't get it . . .
Every once in a while I like to stick my head out the window, look up at the sky and smile . . . for a satellite picture.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
Source: see Olivier
Copyright © 2016 Gaiam, Inc.