Sir Alan Patrick Herbert

The Common Law of England has been laboriously built about a mythical figure-the figure of 'The Reasonable Man'.

A dull speaker, like a plain woman, is credited with all the virtues, for we charitably suppose that a surface so unattractive must be compensated by interior blessings.

The Englishman never enjoys himself except for a noble purpose.

Don't let's go to the dogs tonight, For mother will be there.

People must not do things for fun. We are not here for fun. There is no reference to fun in any Act of Parliament.

The critical period in matrimony is breakfast-time.

The conception of two people living together for twenty-five years without having a cross word suggests a lack of spirit only to be admired in sheep.

Well, fancy giving money to the Government! Might as well have put it down the drain. Fancy giving money to the Government! Nobody will see the stuff again. Well, they've not idea what money's for- Ten to one they'll start another war. I've heard a lot of silly things, but, Lor'! Fancy giving money to the Government!

This high official, all allow, Is grossly overpaid, There wasn't any Board; and now There isn't any trade.

Harriet, Hi! Light of my eye! Come to the pictures and have a good cry, For it's jolly old Saturday, Mad-as-a-hatter-day, Nothing-much-matter-day-night!