I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Contributed by: Zaady
Neurotics build castles in the air, psychotics live in them. My mother cleans them.
My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head.
In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.
My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpets or ruin our lives.
Cats are a waste of fur.
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
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