Some primal termite knocked on wood; and tasted it, and found it good. That is why your Cousin May fell through the parlor floor today.
Ogden Nash (1902 - 1971)
Contributed by: Zaady
Certainly there are lots of things in life that money won't buy, but it's very funny- Have you ever tried to buy them without money?
Source: Happy Days, 1933, The Terrible People
Time is like the ocean, always there, always different.
The turtle lives 'twixt plated decks Which practically conceal its sex I think it clever of the turtle In such a fix to be so fertile.
Source: Hard Lines,1931, The Turtle
Maybe I couldn't be dafter, But I keep wondering if this time we settle our differences before a war instead of after.
Source: Everyone but Thee and Me, 1962, Is There an Oculist in the House?
I was born a jackdaw; why should I try to be an owl?
There was a young belle of old Natchez Whose garments were always in patchez. When comment arose On the state of her clothes, She drawled, "When Ah itchez, Ah scratchez!"
Source: I’m a Stranger Here Myself, 1938, Requiem
There is something about a martini, Ere the dining and dancing begin, And to tell you the truth, It is not the vermouth- I think that perhaps it's the gin.
Source: The Primrose Path. 1935, A Drink with Something in It
Linguistics becomes an ever eerier area, like I feel like I'm in Oz, Just trying to tell it like it was.
Source: What do you want, a meaningful dialogue or a Satisfactory Talk?
Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing.
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