I'll risk forty dollars that he can outjump an frog in Calaveras county
Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
Source: The Celebrated Jumping Frog, 1865
Contributed by: Zaady
In studying the traits and dispositions of the so-called lower animals, and contrasting them with man's, I find the result humiliating to me.
It is just like man's vanity and impertinence to call an animal dumb because it is dumb to his dull perceptions.
Against the assault of laughter, nothing can stand.
The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.
I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want.
I am prepared to meet anyone, but whether anyone is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.
Golf is a good walk spoiled.
Be good and you will be lonesome.
Heaven is by favor; if it were by merit your dog would go in and you would stay out.
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