Groucho Marx

Mrs. Teasdale congratulates him on his coronation and sovereignty: "The eyes of the world are upon you. Notables from every country are gathered here in your honor. This is a gala day for you." Firefly replies: "Well, a gal a day is enough for me. I don't think I could handle any more."

Chicolini: My dog - believe me, he's some smart dog. You know he went with Admiral Byrd to the Pole. Firefly: I'll bet the dog got to the pole first.

Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?

I must confess, I was born at a very early age.

Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.

As soon as I get through with you, you'll have a clear case for divorce and so will my wife.

Look at me, I worked myself up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.

Hello, I must be going.

If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.

In America you can go on the air and kid the politicians, and the politicians can go on the air and kid the people.