George Carlin

A Quote by George Carlin

Think of how stupid the average americian is, then realize that their is 50% more people dumber than him.

George Carlin

Contributed by: Matthew

A Quote by George Carlin on american dream, asleep, and believe

The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it.

George Carlin

Contributed by: Wendy

A Quote by George Carlin

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

George Carlin

Contributed by: Scott

A Quote by George Carlin

Ever wonder about those people who spend $2 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backward.

George Carlin

Contributed by: The Grand Abbot

A Quote by George Carlin on anarchy

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I think people should be allowed to do anything they want. We haven't tried that for a while. Maybe this time it'll work.

George Carlin

Contributed by: The Grand Abbot

A Quote by George Carlin

If we could just find out who's in charge, we could kill him.

George Carlin

Contributed by: The Grand Abbot

A Quote by George Carlin on future, past, and present

There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.

George Carlin

Contributed by: Zaady

A Quote by George Carlin on belief, death, soul, religion, afterlife, and frisbee

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

George Carlin

Contributed by: Zaady

A Quote by George Carlin on perspective and driving

Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a moron.

George Carlin

Contributed by: Zaady

A Quote by George Carlin on crime, freedom, and words

Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight?  They never mention that part to us, do they?

George Carlin

Contributed by: Zaady

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