Think of how stupid the average americian is, then realize that their is 50% more people dumber than him.
Contributed by: Matthew
The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it.
Contributed by: Wendy
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
Contributed by: Scott
Ever wonder about those people who spend $2 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backward.
Contributed by: The Grand Abbot
I think people should be allowed to do anything they want. We haven't tried that for a while. Maybe this time it'll work.
If we could just find out who's in charge, we could kill him.
There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.
Contributed by: Zaady
Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?
What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on?
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