George Bernard Shaw

It is well to be off with the Old Woman before you're on with the new.

There is only one religion, though there are a hundred versions of it.

What the world calls originality is only an unaccustomed method of tickling it.

If parents would only realize how they bore their children!

Is the devil to have all the passions as well as all the good tunes?

Except during the nine months before he draws his first breath, no man manages his affairs as well as a tree does.

The great secret is not having bad manners or good manners or having any other particular sort of manners, but having the same manner for all human souls; in short, behaving as if you were in Heaven, where there are no third class carriages and one soul is as good as another.

Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation with the maximum of opportunity.

Marry Ann; and at the end of a week you'll find no more inspiration in her than in a plate of muffins.

What God hath joined together no man shall ever put asunder: God will take care of that.