Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he is buying.
Contributed by: Zaady
No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.
Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky.
Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep.
Randomness scares people. Religion is a way to explain randomness.
Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women it is merely a good excuse not to play football.
Success didn't spoil me; I've always been insufferable.
The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to offer them a drink.
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