If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.
Dorothy Parker (1893 - 1967)
Contributed by: Zaady
On writing humor: There must be courage; there must be no awe. There must be criticism, for humor, to my mind, is encapsulated in criticism. There must be a disciplined eye and a wild mind.
On sharing space with Robert Benchley while working on "Vanity Fair," magazine: He and I had an office so tiny that an inch smaller and it would have been adultery.
Source: quoted in Malcolm Cowley ed Writers at Work, Viking 1958
On Isadora Duncan: There was never a place for her in the ranks of the terrible, slow army of the cautious. She ran ahead, where there were no paths.
Source: New Yorker, 1928.
On lady novelists: As artists they're rot, but as providers they're oil wells; they gush. Norris said she never wrote a story unless it was fun to do. I understand Ferber whistles at her typewriter.
Source: Interview in Writers at Work (First Series, ed. by Malcolm Cowley, 1958).
Said of her husband on the day their divorce became final: Oh, don't worry about Alan. . . . Alan will always land on somebody's feet.
Source: You Might As Well Live, by John Keats, Pt. IV, Ch. 1, 1970.
On the Yale prom: If all the girls attending it were laid end to end - I wouldn't be at all surprised.
Source: quoted in Alexander Woollcott, While Rome Burns
On writing humor: There must be a magnificent disregard of your reader, for if he cannot follow you, there is nothing you can do about it.
Razors pain you; Rivers are damp; Acids stain you; And drugs cause cramp. Guns aren't lawful; Nooses give; Gas smells awful; You might as well live.
Source: Enough Rope
All I say is, nobody has any business to go around looking like a horse and behaving as if it were all right. You don't catch horses going around looking like people, do you?
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