Every year back spring comes, with nasty little birds, yapping their fool heads off.
Dorothy Parker (1893 - 1967)
Contributed by: Zaady
Suggested epitaph for her own tombstone: This is on me.
Source: You Might As Well Live, Pt 1. Ch 5, by J. Keats, 1970.
This living, this living, this living Was never a project of mine.
Source: Sunset Gun, 1928.
Telegram to a friend who had just become a mother after a prolonged pregnancy: Good work, Mary. We all knew you had it in you.
Source: "While Rome Burns," Our Mrs. Parker, by Alexander Woollcott, 1934.
It costs me never a stab nor squirm To tread by chance upon a worm. 'Aha, my little dear,' I say, 'Your clan will pay me back one day.'
Source: 'Thought for a Sunshiny Morning.' Sunset Gun
If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.
When told she was very outspoken: Outspoken by whom?
Men seldom make passes At girls who wear glasses.
Source: Enough Rope
By the time you swear you're his, Shivering and sighing, And he vows his passion is Infinite, undying - Lady make note of this: One of you is lying.
Source: Unfortunate Coincidence
On naming her canary 'Onan'; referring to Genesis, 38:9: Because he spills his seed on the ground.
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