I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon.
Source: when a journalist asked him if he was happy
Contributed by: Zaady
Husband at the bar: "I wanted to keep it simple, but she wanted a big divorce with reporters, photographers, witnesses. . . ."
Source: The Lockhorns, a cartoon
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