When the holidays approach, we receive a lot of requests from people who are experiencing more conflict and stress in their relationships.
If you’re feeling increased pressures around this time of the year, you’re definitely not alone. Along with the possibilities of great joy in this season come other feelings as well. It’s important to remember that all feelings come through the same “faucet” of your awareness, and that the holidays are an ideal time to open yourself to learning from every relationship moment.
Here are two of the holiday tips we find ourselves passing along most often:
Give yourself the gift of completion.
Much of the stress of daily life is caused by incompletion. The most stress occurs around significant emotional communications being left incomplete. Many of us have people in our lives with whom we have big incompletions: secrets, debts, unspoken regrets, unexpressed I-love-you’s. This stress often magnifies around the holidays because of the focus on family, joy and love.
The holidays are a good time to make a list of incompletions in your life, and give yourself the holiday gift of completing as many as you can. Most significant incompletions boil down to a minute or two of heartfelt communication, but many of us put off that minute or two all year long. Now’s the time!
Remember to take time for yourself in this season.
There’s much emphasis on doing things and giving to others around the holidays, but it’s wise to take heed from a little poem one of our clients sent us:
If I take an hour a day for me,
I can give back twenty-three.
If I forget to take my one,
I make sure nobody has any fun!
A long soak in a hot bath, some breathing, gentle yoga, or meditation practice, a quiet moment with a cup of your favorite tea: Things like that can go a long way to restoring your serenity. A walk in nature, by yourself or with loved ones, can be a gift that means more than any you could buy in a store.
Gay and Katie